Breaking Reality
by Queen Mafalda
Summary: Watching Lily leave had to be the most heartbreaking for me. Maybe it was because she was the youngest of our family, or maybe it was for another reason, a reason I denied myself access to since the day she was born.
1. Chapter I: Unshed Tears

**AN: **I'm not quite sure if this story line has ever been used before, but it has been lingering in my mind for a little too long so I decided to finally write about it. The story is DH & Epilogue-compliant and will show over the chapters how Harry and Hermione's relationship first began and flourishes after a 12-year hiatus following their children's acceptance into Hogwarts. Please read and review!

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**Disclaimer**: My name is not J.K. Rowling; therefore Harry Potter is not mine.

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**Chapter 1: Unshed Tears**

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I watched longingly as the Hogwarts Express quickly gained speed; Lily's hand waving furiously from within her train compartment. A few coaches down, Albus and James' heads poked out into sight, their raven hair ruffling with the breeze as they flashed identical grins to us in farewell. Ginny stood right to my side, clutching my shirtsleeve as she tearfully waved back to our children,

"It's always so sad to see them leave," she whispered, her voice quivering as she spoke. "Now I finally understand why mum cried all those years when it was us leaving for Hogwarts," she added with a sigh, unshed tears clinging to her lashes.

I nodded absently, putting an arm around Ginny, lost in my own cloud of thoughts. Watching Lily leave had to be the most heartbreaking for me. Maybe it was because she was the youngest of our family, or maybe it was for another reason, a reason I denied myself access to since the day she was born.

I glanced over to where Ron and Hermione stood, their bodies enshrouded in the morning's London fog. Ron looked over at us signaling their departure with a nod, Hermione walking by his side, sent a small smile to Ginny and I as she passed. I tried in vain to smile back at her, but I knew the gesture hadn't quite reached my eyes. A flicker of recognition glimmered through her momentarily, but she did not stop to question me or ask what was wrong. I didn't blame her; life had left us all victims to its never-ending twists, even now years after the war. The most we could do was hold onto those we loved more than life itself and keep ourselves from dwelling on the past.

I smiled to myself as the memory of Lily waving frantically flashed through my mind once again. She had entered our lives during the most pressing of circumstances, a blessed gift, which became ours one rainy night all those years back. The two of us had taken time off to live out in the sprawling country that year, keeping away from the public eye which never seemed to grant us any form of peace or solace while at home. James and Albus were still young, and Ginny and I hoped that we could complete our nearly perfect family with the addition of a sweet little girl to it. But with the birth of Albus, Ginny had been left weak, and her attempts to conceive proved fruitless as the year passed on. She blamed herself as to why she couldn't provide me with the baby daughter I had always wished for, but in no way did I ever hold Ginny responsible. It had never been her fault; it had always been mine.

It was that very year Lily Luna Potter entered our lives, a miracle bestowed upon our family when Ginny and I had thought all hope had been lost.

I still remember that night, as clearly as if it were yesterday, the night a soaking Luna Lovegood-Scamander had brought her to our doorstep, a tuft of red hair peaking out of the soft pink bundle clutched tightly in her arms. I realized from that very moment, I could never let her go. Peering at me with beautiful lidded eyes, her head crowned in flaming red hair, I knew I had finally found her, the daughter I had always wished to have, and the near image of my mother who had died so selflessly in an effort to save my life. I thanked the muggle gods silently; this truly was a blessing.

She was the beautiful little secret Ginny and I kept to ourselves since that very night., since the day we adopted her as our very own daughter. Lily Luna Potter, Lily in memory of my mother whom she so closely resembled, and Luna for the woman who had so graciously placed her into our welcoming arms.

And with that we had finally completed our small family. I still remember how Ginny cried joyously to herself that fateful night in front of the fireplace, clutching Lily to her body and showering her with sweet, loving kisses. No one could have been happier nor more relieved than Ginny was.

With a single smile, Lily had mended the deepening cracks in our marriage, the feelings of hopelessness within us and the longing we had always held to have a daughter of our own.

We didn't know much about Lily's origins other than the fact that she had been born to a mother whose family would break at the image of her very existence. Luna had taken her away from St. Mungo's while her birth mother lay unconscious from childbirth and the father absent at her bedside.

Ginny did not bother to question Luna any further on the biological parents' whereabouts. She was perfectly content with the child who now slept peacefully in her arms. But I knew by just glancing at Luna, that she was hiding something from us both. As Ginny headed up the stairs to prepare a room for our new daughter leaving Lily in my care, I took advantage of the moment and dragged Luna into the kitchens behind me, intent on questioning her.

She gazed at me with her bright blue eyes, a certain sadness amongst them. But I knew Luna; she couldn't keep the truth away from me for very long. She finally broke down after a considerable amount of nudging and confessed to me that the child belonged to none other than my very best friend, Hermione Granger-Weasley. Lily had been born to her earlier this evening while Ron was away for the week on travel, oblivious to the circumstances surrounding his family.

At first I had been utterly shocked remembering Luna's words. How could this small baby have possibly "broken their family apart"?

And then I realized it. One glimpse back at my new daughter was enough to confirm my growing doubts. Looking more closely at Lily I noticed a ring of emerald green which enshrouded her predominantly brown eyes. A shade of green reminiscent of a certain world-famous wizard residing in magical London...myself.

I fought for words, but they failed me as I tried to choke out a comprehensive sentence. Luna placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. A tear trickling down her cheek at the sight of my own heartbreak. I squeezed her fingers with my free hand, searching for answers as the questions began to rise.

I could only imagine the devastation if Ron or Ginny knew the truth regarding the newest Potter. The word havoc would be redefined, our families destroyed, the children left hapless in our self-made misery.

Days later Ron apparated into St. Mungo's upon receiving a late owl from the hospital regarding Hermione's current condition. The nurse under Luna's instruction had told the grieving couple that their daughter had been a stillborn, buried within St. Mungo's memorial grounds shortly after her birth. Hermione after undergoing a serious operation while unconscious would now never again be able to conceive. And the family grieved, Rose and Hugo, were all that they had now.

Later that week, I received an owl from Ron explaining the recent incidents. Ginny mourned at the thought of losing her niece, not knowing that her niece and new daughter were one and the same. I owled Ron back, expressing my concern for his family, I felt horrible knowing their pain and being the reason behind it. But I hoped that this pain would be more bearable and forgiving than Ron realizing his youngest child was not his own but rather his best friend's, the same best friend who happened to be married to his very own baby sister. I hoped one day to eventually reveal the truth to them, but that day never came.

Over the years Hermione and Ron were able to gradually look past the loss of their daughter, Emily Anne Weasley, involving themselves more with Rose and Hugo, and our own family. I almost cried the day we arrived back to London nearly a month later, as Hermione held Lily for the first time, not knowing that she was in fact the mother of the child she so lovingly cradled in her arms.

Ron exclaimed his surprise at the presence of our new child, amicably scolding me for not telling him that Ginny had been pregnant all this while. I bit back the guilt, which made its way up into the back of my throat as he spoke. Ginny and I had decided to keep the adoption of Lily a secret not wanting to alert the media of her childbearing troubles nor add criticism from the them regarding our informal adoption. We had made it so that it seemed as if Ginny had simply given birth at our home in the countryside. With ginger hair reminiscent of Ginny and hazel eyes a perfect blend of us both, the wizarding world was none the wiser.

And so our families grew up, sheltered and loved over the years. The bickering of newlyweds slowly dying down as maturity gained in its stead. But 11-year-old Lily Potter was enough proof that once upon a time, not all had been well within our respective marriages. I loved Ginny, and I had never wished to hurt her. Hurting her meant hurting our children, which indirectly inflicted Ron and Hermione's family in the process. So Lily Potter became the daughter of Ginny and I, and she grew up unknowingly calling her very own mother, Aunt Hermione, over the years.

To this day Ron still mentions how he wished he were there when his third child had been born. That it must have been the stress due to his absence on Hermione that caused Emily Anne's stillbirth and his wife's subsequent unconsciousness.

Hermione and Ron never realized that their Emily Anne Weasley and my Lily Luna Potter were one and the same.

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**TBC…**

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**AN:** So, what do you think?? Please Review!


	2. Chapter II: Auburn Curls

**AN: **I was surprised to see so many alerts and favorites added just after the first chapter. Thank you all for the much-appreciated support. Now, bear with me as we tumble through the R/Hr and H/G before the real H/Hr begins!

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Harry Potter.

**EDIT: **(This note will be posted here and for the following chapter): It has been brought to my attention that Albus is the only one of the Potter children with green eyes. Lily's eye color is not mentioned in the books, so I gave her eye-color of hazel, which is genetically possible for a child born to either Harry/Hermione or Harry/Ginny (for canon's sake). Also, red hair is a viable hair color for the child of a brown-haired and black-haired parent. Look it up if you do not believe me. I know this having taken Genetics at the college level. We only know that Harry's mother had red hair, and there is no telling what exactly Hermione's genes are other than the fact that one of her two hair-color related genes codes for brown hair. But the other? Well that is up to our wicked imaginations to decide!

My apologies to those who went along with the story and did not question the genetic whereabouts of Lily L. Potter, but for those who insisted otherwise, there is your reasoning.

For everyone who had started reading this story before my edit, I have made sure to change Lily's eye color from my initial "emerald green" to "hazel" in the previous chapters in order to stay in line with canon.

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**Chapter 1: Auburn Curls**

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I sat at my desk, riffling through paperwork as Ginny prepared dinner downstairs. The house seemed eerily quiet with the absence of James, Albus and now Lily as well. Ginny and I rarely talked much these days. If we did it was about the children or how errands needed to be ran. Never about the weather, the sunset or our undying love for each other. On occasion she would snuggle up beside me on the couch or place a soft kiss on my lips, but the passion we once had was effortlessly lost the night Lily was naively conceived. I knew Ginny realized it too, though she never cared to admit it. But I could see it in the depths of her brown eyes as she gazed at me; our love wasn't so undying anymore. With the children at home, we were very different, full of smiles and laughter. We laughed for them, smiled for them, but not for each other. To say we were unhappy would be a false statement; the two of us seemed perfectly content floating on with our own quiet but equally separate lives.

Sometimes I would come home to see Ginny softly crying in her study, a picture of James and Albus pressed to her lithe frame. I always wondered why she held that certain picture, which lacked Lily, maybe she aware of the truth after all.

Perhaps the past few years had been a dip in our relationship. I was never entirely sure where I stood in our relationship, but lately things had gotten better. We found ourselves on more than one occasion rushing to the bedroom limbs intertwined. But even then, I felt as if something were amiss.

I gazed at a picture of the children on my desktop. James sat between Lily and Albus, his arms holding onto their shoulders as if in a tight embrace. Lily was smiling merrily, auburn curls brushing over her rosy cheeks as she laughed, hazel eyes full of mirth. I was touched at the sight. Though Hermione belonged to Ron ever since the war, I always held a piece of her within Lily. She was the perfect union of our love, of our passion, a devotion which held no future.

I closed my files as Ginny called from downstairs. Her back was towards me as I entered the dining room.

Encircling my arms around her waist, she leaned into me, soaking up the warmth of our embrace.

"I miss them already," she said spooning a mouthful of soup into her mouth as she sat down.

I nodded, "It never is the same without them here."

And so the silence ensued, as it did always. My thoughts floating away from our dinner to just life in general, and to how things may have been different, had I stepped up before Ron, and confessed my true feelings towards Hermione.

There was never a dull moment with her around. Our conversations were full of humor, wit and most importantly, laughter. While Ginny and I shared quidditch in common, Hermione and I shared the world. She always knew what I was feeling, what to say and how to see reason when I was wrong. Where Ginny was my best friend's sister who happened to be in the right place at the right time, Hermione was my closest friend, my confidante.

I shook my head. It had always been like this. Whenever I allowed my thoughts to glide, they always settled upon Hermione, drifting towards my regrets from the past.

I still remember how joyous Ron had been on their wedding day, grinning like a madman as Hermione walked up the aisle. I remember how my heart quaked as she joined hands with him, their lips meeting in a loving kiss. She had made a beautiful bride. And had I made the right decisions, she may have even been my own beautiful bride. But Ron, I could never do that to Ron. He was my best friend, my brother, the only family I had ever known. All his life he grew up shadowed by the pride and prestige of his brothers. And now he had finally gotten something he wished to have all his life. Hermione Granger. Unbeknownst to him, it had been a wish common to us both.

When I had married Ginny, it had never been a compromise. I truly loved her, and still do, but perhaps not as passionately and adoringly, as it should have been. She was my first love, but irreversibly not my last. Marrying Ginny, made Ron and Molly officially my family. I had someone to turn to, someone to fall back upon, and someone to call my very own. But with every good thing comes its own sacrifice. And for a family I had to sacrifice my true love, my Hermione.

A sigh escaped my parted lips. I suppose _my_ isn't quite the right pronoun for her name. She had never been mine, even when I first realized my affections for her were shared between us both. Hermione was Ron's wife, and Ginny mine. Nobody could ever bear to change that. I was not an adulterer. I refused to believe that. I love my wife, but she was not and would never be my _true_ love. Upholding affections for your true love could never be considered a sin, could it?

I snapped out of my thoughts as I felt Ginny's nimble fingers run across my lower back. Tugging at the edge of my shirt as she gently pushed me towards the inviting couch. I brought her in front of me, pulling her in for a languid kiss as she brought me down with her onto the cushions below.

I stared longingly into her dark brown eyes, my mind only seeing…Hermione.

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**TBC…**

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**AN: **Hi there. Yes you. Please take time to kindly review! :D


	3. Chapter III: Letting Go

**AN: **Thank you all for the kind reviews and story alerts/favorite-ing. It means a lot!

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Harry Potter.

**EDIT: **(This note was posted on my previous chapter as well): It has been brought to my attention that Albus is the only one of the Potter children with green eyes. Lily's eye color is not mentioned in the books, so I gave her eye-color of hazel, which is genetically possible for a child born to either Harry/Hermione or Harry/Ginny (for canon's sake). Also, red hair is a viable hair color for the child of a brown-haired and black-haired parent. Look it up if you do not believe me. I know this having taken Genetics at the college level. We only know that Harry's mother had red hair, and there is no telling what exactly Hermione's genes are other than the fact that one of her hair-color related genes codes for brown hair. But the other? Well that is up to our wicked imaginations to decide!

My apologies to those who went along with the story and did not question the genetic whereabouts of Lily L. Potter, but for those who insisted otherwise, there is your reasoning.

For everyone who had started reading this story before my edit, I have made sure to change Lily's eye color from my initial "emerald green" to "hazel" in the previous chapters in order to stay in line with canon.

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**Chapter 3: Letting Go**

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I felt a burning sensation in the back of my eyes as I curled up beside Ginny in our bed. It was always the way I felt after being intimate with her. I suppose it reminded me of our past years and that was simply enough to cause my gut to sink. I could hear her, near me, snoring ever so softly, her beautiful red hair stark against the white of her pillow. Ginny was beautiful both inside and out, and it pained me to be in love with another. Though what was I to do if the heart did not wish to comply with my mind?

As I drifted off to sleep, flashes of memories spun through my mind. I still remembered that fateful night with startling clarity. It had been of the best day of my life, and the most guilt-ridden as well.

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It had been a particularly extreme case. The Auror office was in absolute mayhem. Months had passed and the workings of Neo-Death Eaters could be seen across England to be as strong as ever. At that point in time, Ron had still been working beside me for the Office of Magical Law Enforcement as a fellow Auror. Hermione had left our ranks the previous year to take up a position offered to her from the Department of Mysteries. She was the country's youngest Head Unspeakable to ever join the Ministry of Magic, and no one could be more proud.

That evening the junior Aurors had received a promising lead from members of the underground magical mafias. It was revealed to us that there had been somewhat of a power struggle between the growing followers of the dark arts, and soon a schism had been formed. The Neo-Death Eater's new enemy had suddenly become our greatest ally. But little did we know, that it had all been a formulated hoax.

That night several of the on-duty Aurors were severely injured and almost killed, myself included. I had been rushed to St. Mungo's while still in a coma due to an unknown dark curse having been hurled my way, targeted straight to the head. Ron had been taken in as well, luckily only suffering from a few broken ribs and minimal foot sprains. I knew he had been in despair that entire night while we headed out for our mission. Things had gone a bit overboard between him and Hermione. She even went to the lengths of filing for a wizard divorce, an official annulment of marriage. I knew his mind had been elsewhere during the entirety of the case, and I urged him to take leave and properly sort out his thoughts. But he had refused, claiming that he was where he wanted to be, amidst the chaos and disarray found at the Ministry's Office of Magical Law Enforcement.

The curse I had fallen prey to had tampered with my mind, sorting through my memories and blurring them on whim. I hadn't realized until later that the large vials at my bedside were for a memory-replenishing potion all along, one which fought within me to ease the struggles of my mind as it attempted to repair the misdoings of a severely dark curse. A hex so merciless that it could strip myself of my very identity, all the memories which had made me who I was and who I had become to be.

When I first awoke from my coma, full stabilization had yet to envelope my mind. I could only remember everything up until the end of my 6th year at Hogwarts. The next several years of my life still an unrecognizable haze, only to be mended over the days with sufficient intakes of the replenishing potion.

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_I glanced about blearily feeling about for my glasses as I struggled to rise in what seemed to be a cot of some sort. The cotton fabric of my blanket itched annoyingly against my legs as the lingering heat of midday set in. I looked about trying to make sense of my surroundings._

'_This must be some sort of private room in the hospital wing,' I thought, noticing a set of vials and gauze at my bedside. An aged wooden chair lay vacant at my bedside and I sunk back into the unpleasant sheets wondering how I had ended up here._

_I probed my mind for some sort of memory regarding recent events, my thoughts running uneasily as they landed on the subject of Dumbledore's funeral. My stomach clenched. I remembered breaking up with Ginny as the haunting idea of war approached; Dumbledore's death hadn't been the first indicator of its forthcoming after all. I still remember the faltering expression on Ginny's face which had been flashed my way upon our split. I suppose she too realized that it had been for the better. What she hadn't realized then, were my growing feelings for Hermione, our good and mutual friend. _

_I noticed an elderly woman approaching me; she looked nothing like Madame Pomfrey and I wondered who she was. An assistant perhaps?_

"_There, there Mr. Potter," she soothed as I attempted again to sit up and gain a better look at the unfamiliar nurse. _

"_Drink up," she motioned, pouring a somewhat slimy potion down my throat. "I'm sure you'll remember everything in no time at all," she announced somewhat cheerily._

_I stared at her confused, huffing as she gently prodded me to lie back down against the bed. "You have a visitor too, may I allow her inside?" she asked as I tried to find a comfortable position in the rather uncomfortable bed._

"_Of course," I muttered wishing to know how I had ended up in the hospital wing to begin with. A frown formed across my face as I assumed the future 'visitor' to be none other than my now ex-girlfriend, Ginny Weasley herself._

_The nurse trotted off and __and I mused to myself the idea of faking a deep slumber _when Ginny came in. My thoughts were suddenly snatched away from me as I heard a worried voice shout "Harry!" from across the room.

_I saw the aging nurse give Hermione a reprimanding look as she briskly dashed towards my bed. I watched her approach me, mistaking her crinkled work robes as her Hogwarts uniform. She was still as beautiful as always, even in her disheveled state._

"_How are you?" I asked peering up into her eyes._

_I heard her laugh, a feminine chuckle gurgling up from deep within her. It was all music to my ears._

"_Harry! I should be asking you that! Honestly, I don't understand you at all sometimes," she replied grinning down at me._

_I smiled back at her, feeling the warmth of her hand encompass my own as she used the other to brush away the fringe away from my eyes. Somehow she looked older and more mature than what I was used to, and I wondered what it was about Hermione that had so quickly changed._

"_Where's Ron?" I asked her __her noticing a scowl mar her pretty feature as the question sunk in._

"_He's in another area being taken care of," she muttered turning away from my questioning gaze. "Don't worry," she acknowledged, noticing the look of apprehension which crossed my face,"He'll be perfectly fine in no time at all."_

"_What happened? What's wrong?" I asked feeling suddenly confused and extremely helpless. I had yet to figure out why I was even in the hospital wing to begin with._

"_There was an attack, Harry. You were hit by a dark curse. Ron was injured as well, just not as badly," she said in almost a whisper. "I feel horrible now. Maybe this wouldn't have happened to him if I hadn't ended it so suddenly with him," she murmured a tear slipping down forlornly from the corner of her eye._

_My thumb stroked her hand comfortingly as I wondered why I couldn't remember any such attack. 'Who would have attacked Hogwarts immediately after Dumbledore's murder?' I questioned to myself absently. I frowned in resignation, it was a war after all; anything was possible. _

_Hermione sighed pulling me out of my own thoughts. I gazed at her in confusion, "I hadn't realized you an Ron had ended it too," I remarked softly._

_She looked at me strangely. "Too? Who else broke up?" she asked curiously._

"_Me and Ginny of course, earlier today. Don't you remember?" I asked wondering how she had suddenly forgotten such recent events._

_Hermione looked aghast. "Oh Harry!" she cried throwing her arms around me. "I'm so sorry. _

_All this happening to you in a single day must be so horrible!" she exclaimed with a frown._

_I sighed tiredly. Pulling her away slightly to look her in the eye. "These things happen for a reason Hermione, its part of living I guess," I reasoned my hands still grasping her shoulders awkwardly._

_She nodded, looking away again as tears filled her eyes. "Why did you split with Ginny, Harry?" she asked turning her head back to face me. "And what about the children?"_

'_The children?' I wondered in confusion. 'What children?' I thought to myself __uneasily. __Brushing the entire idea aside, I chose to answer __her more practical question instead._

"_I didn't want her to get hurt, to make her life any more complicated than it already is," I muttered my fingers fidgeting uncomfortably with the edge of my blanket._

_Hermione looked at me squarely. "Is that really it Harry? You know there's no use for you to hide these things from me," she said her chin turned up defiantly. "I feel as if everyone is hiding something from me these days! The nurse won't even tell me what exactly is wrong with you. She claims that it is simply 'too painful' " she ranted her arms flailing in annoyance._

___I understood her pain, if anyone deserved to know the truth it was Hermione. _I gazed into her eyes, my throat constricting. I wondered if it was safe to share with her my true feelings. We were both so fresh out of relationships. It wouldn't be fair to Ron and it wouldn't be fair to Ginny.

"_Hermione…well, you see…" I trailed off, looking away and out the windows__; surprised to catch sight of a variety of bushy trees rather than the Black Lake I had expected to see._

"_What is it Harry?" Hermione prodded, nudging my face back into perspective with her soft touch._

"_I think I love you," I blurted out, my eyes widening in surprise at my own audacity._

_Hermione gasped, her reaction mirroring my own, a small hand clasped over her mouth in pure shock._

"_Oh Harry…" she whispered, her hand falling back down to grasp my own once more._

_I looked away again,__ tugging at the lose strings of my blanket. _"I've been feeling it for a while now. I never knew how to tell you. Once I had finally gained the courage, Ron had already professed his feelings for you…" I murmured rambling on .

_I turned back to look at her, but before I could even begin to continue, I felt her warm mouth on my own. Small nimble hands trailing down my chest as she leaned in, crawling onto my cot. I pulled her to my side, running my fingers through her unruly mass of hair, hearing her moan into my mouth as I deepened the kiss. I tugged at the hem of her shirt releasing it from the constraints of her skirt as she drew searing patterns into my burning skin._

_One thing had led to another, and before I knew it she lay writhing under me. Flesh on flesh, I suddenly felt a passion I never had known before. She was so beautiful and now finally mine as I moved inside her, adrenaline shooting through me as we momentarily fused into one._

_I soon felt her quickly clench under me, and it undoubtedly became most amazing moment of my life. To finally be able to… let… go._

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_The next morning I awoke slowly smiling at the thoughts of the previous day. I turned to my side in search of Hermione to only find my room completely vacant, unraveling myself from the bed sheets twisted around me. I gingerly pulled on my boxers and the rest of my clothes, which seemed to be provided to me by the infirmary for my own comfort. _

_I sighed falling back onto the covers of my hospital bed. We had rushed into things too quickly, it seemed. Hermione must have panicked from our rash course in actions and now had now fled from sight. I had to speak to her. Right what she must have deemed wrong. I stretched lazily in bed, wondering when I would finally be able to get out of here. I saw another potion vial on my bed with a cup near it for my own convenience. I recognized it as the one from the previous day and tipped it languidly into my mouth. My expression contorting as the congealing liquid slugged down my throat. I gulped frantically trying to rid myself of its disgusting feeling and I collapsed back onto the bed, wishing for Hermione to return as I fell into an uneasy state of sleep._

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_The next day I was awakened by the feeling of a hand running gently through my hair and a soft kiss being placed on my cheek. I opened my eyes slowly as the morning sun glared down at me from the window nearby. Before I could focus on the person caressing me, I felt another someone bustle towards my bed and prop open my mouth as yet another vial was brought to my lips._

"_It's the last one, Mr. Potter," the nurse from a few days ago soothed. I nodded wearily, gulping down the awful potion. I felt her place my glasses onto the bridge of my nose as I glanced back at up at the smiling lady._

"_Someone special has been waiting for you to awaken," she said motioning behind her. I turned to get a better look as she continued,_

"_Your most lovely __**wife**__."_

_I felt myself gasp for air, as reality came crashing back down onto me. Ginny grinned adoringly at my healthy state, now in perfect view with a beautiful diamond ring glinting fiercely on her finger._

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**TBC…**

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**AN: **So, what do you think? Please Review!


	4. Chapter IV: Disheartening Revelations

**AN: **I was so surprised to see the variety of notifications I received after my last chapter. I thank you all for taking interest in my story and I hope that you continue to do so as the fic progresses. And please remember, reviews are most appreciated by writers, we long to know what our audience thinks of our works.

**Disclaimer**: JKR owns.

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**AN II [edit]: Hey guys, my FFNET account was being screwy so I had to repost this chapter (it was initially posted last night-about 13 hours ago), I'm sorry if you received the alert/notification twice. **

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**Chapter 4: Disheartening Revelations**

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_I felt my mind spinning uncontrollably. One glance at Ginny had been enough to cause an overwhelming vortex of memories to come hurtling my way. In a flash I felt my resolve weaken and my heart pound painfully within me. It was too much to bear. I could not believe what I had done._

_James. Albus. Ginny. Our marriage. My fatherhood. The mission. It all came back to me with startling clarity. I felt something crawl up the walls of my stomach and into the back of my throat. I gaped at Ginny, my wife, who stood in front of me leaning forward in her seat. I must have looked ridiculous, gawking at her as if seeing her for the very first time._

"_It's all a bit much, isn't it sir?" the nurse asked understandingly from my left._

_I turned to look at her, my vision still noticeably blurred despite having my glasses on. I helplessly nodded as my mind swarmed with memories of Hermione and our previous encounter. Her heated kisses, my gentle caresses, our passionate lovemaking. I gasped for air. It had all been a misunderstanding, I finally realized. She had made sense of it before I had, fleeing from sight due to the gut-wrenching guilt it wreaked of, the very guilt that trickled down my veins and caused the stinging ache in my heart to persist._

_I felt Ginny scoot closer to my bed, holding my hand gently. "Harry?" she asked softly, searching my eyes for some sign of recognition._

_I smiled at her feebly, squeezing her hand within my own and bringing it to my lips as I kissed the tips of her delicate fingers._

"_I came by the first night, the night they brought you in," she began, tears filling her eyes. "I couldn't stand to see you hurt, your body so lifeless. The kids wouldn't stop crying, they wanted to know if you would ever…wake up," she finished, a sob interrupting her anxious words. _

_I nodded, pulling her in for an embrace. Kissing her hair as she clung onto me, using the crook of her neck to muffle the strangled sounds that arose from deep inside my throat. She continued to sob unabashedly into my chest. And I sat beside her, still at a loss for words._

_I noticed that the nurse had left to give us some privacy, and for once I was genuinely grateful for her courtesy._

_Ginny pulled away from me slowly, pushing a loose strand of red hair behind her ear as she spoke,_

"_The doctors say we can check you out this afternoon. Your memory has been restored, and since you didn't suffer from any serious physical injuries, you should be healthy enough to return home," _

_I nodded; glad to get out of the ruddy infirmary, which I finally realized had been St. Mungo's all along._

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And so I was finally out of the hospital. Ron had been dismissed the next day, after his ribcage had been properly healed, and his bones all grown back into place. As Ginny opened the door to our London home, James and Albus came hurtling my way, Molly in tow. She pulled me in for a motherly hug, patting my cheeks gently as if to make sure she wasn't just imagining my presence. I kissed her cheek softly and proceeded to stoop down and embrace my adoring sons. I couldn't believe that I had almost lost them, or rather the very precious memories of them I held close to my heart.

I still had not received word from Hermione, even a full two weeks after I rejoined my ranks at the Auror office. She seemed to be avoiding me at all costs and I wished to know what she was felt regarding our situation. Shame? Foolishness? Confusion? I couldn't quite pinpoint her distanced emotions and I felt extremely at loss because of it.

On my first day back at the office, I ran into a rather cheerful Ron Weasley who elatedly notified me that Hermione had called off all plans for a divorce and taken leave from work to spend more time with the children at home. He ranted on about how their marriage had never been better and that the kids never more overjoyed. I smiled at him halfheartedly, not knowing quite what to think. I suppose I was happy for Ron, but deep down inside, my feelings for Hermione simmered dangerously. I thought that with my marriage to Ginny, romancing Hermione had become a closed chapter. But a fortnight ago, the situation had proven otherwise; not to mention, Hermione seemed more than willing to return my feelings as I poured my heart out to her, not realizing the grave mistake we were making.

And so the week continued and I finally ran into Hermione at a Weasley lunch one humid afternoon at the Burrow, (which had been restored shortly after the war.) She spoke to me as if nothing had transpired between us, but I knew better than to fall victim to her guiles.

I could have sworn I saw a timid spark of desire flair up within her eyes as we spoke, but I was never for sure. Yet I remained convinced that our love was still present at hand.

_Later that day, I forcefully sat her down in the orchard outside. But before I could even begin to speak, she glanced away from me and started bawling quietly to herself. I understood her suffering. We had both unknowingly committed a crime and I wondered weakly to my self what we had done to so unjustly become swamped into such a predicament._

_I watched her cry, my heart beating forcefully within me as she drowned beside me in anguish. I longed to hold her close to myself as I had done so brazenly before. But I knew within me that she wouldn't dare to comply. Finally after several sobering minutes, she cleared her throat disparagingly and managed to speak to me as I sat across from her awkwardly on the other side of the bench._

_I don't remember much of our conversation, other than that the few facts she made clear. She never wished to speak again of the matter or be reminded of it either. It had all been a mistake. And furthermore it would cause the demise of both of our families were it to become knowledgeable to our respective spouses._

_She stood to take leave, and I stepped up shortly after her, daring to minimize the gap between us. She turned to look at me haltingly, her eyes full of an emotion I could not quite recognize._

"_I will always love you, Harry James Potter," she finally murmured, her soft voice calming my mind as she leaned in and swiftly kissed the corner of my mouth. I felt a gentle rush of heat as warmth flowed into my cheeks and I glanced back up once again to only see her retreating figure. With that she was gone, walking away from me, down past the alcove of trees we had ventured beyond only minutes before._

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Another month had passed and more proof of Ron and Hermione's happy marriage came tumbling down my path. Hermione had announced that she was once again expecting and Ron was happier than words could even manage to describe. My heart thudded uneasily within me as I saw their love flourish and their children prosper. My relationship with Ginny had yet to be the same. But I still played the role of dutiful and loving husband, though my mind stubbornly refused to comply. It chose rather to revolve around Hermione and other miscellaneous thoughts concerning her. I couldn't quite manage for it to simply let the idea of her go.

It was those very overwhelming emotions that became the motivating factor behind Ginny and our family's move out to the country. Ron had been saddened at first, but understood that sometimes we all needed to take time out for ourselves and push aside the exhausting demands of life. With everything we had been through that year, our family deserved a much-needed break. Hermione stood beside Ron silent and motionless, a smile unconvincingly plastered across her face. And I wished with all my heart to know what she was thinking, but her perceptive brown eyes blocked me out of her mind and every pertinent emotion they held.

And so with that Ginny and I bought a charming little cottage far within the English countryside. James and Albus welcomed the change gladly and even Ginny and I felt comforted by its presence. Of course our happiness did not last long, as Ginny too made her final and unsuccessful attempts at pregnancy. Anguish filled my sullen being once again and I longed to remember what it felt like to be happy. My sorrow was short-lived as it was hastily flung aside by the advent of a miracle:

A miracle by the name of Lily Luna Potter.

I could not be any happier.

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**TBC…**

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**AN: **So there you have it! The full circle describing Harry and Hermione's past circumstances. The next chapter will bring us back to the present and the story will continue to unfold. Please Review!


	5. Chapter V: The Heart's Desires

**AN: **I'm so sorry for the month late update! I started working full time and then school started back up and I just got swamped with everything. Thankfully, it's the long weekend and I have some extra time on my hands, so here it is, the next installment of _Breaking Reality_. Please R&R!

**Disclaimer**: JKR owns.

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**Chapter 5: The Heart's Desires**

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Five weeks had passed since Lily first stepped foot into Hogwarts. I sat absently in the corner booth of a local wizarding café near the Ministry. The sound of hearty laughter causing me to snap out of my dismal mood and I noticed from the side that Ron and Hermione were making their way over to my booth.

The redhead had a casual arm over his wife's shoulders, and I watched as his face lit up with a string of expressions as he recounted a story of sorts to Hermione. She brought her hand up in an effort to stifle her laughter but ended up doubling over in delight as Ron too chuckled over their private joke. I felt the dull thuds of my heart within me, if only that sort of joy still existed in my life.

I stood up to greet the two. Embracing Ron in a manly hug. I moved over to place a kiss on Hermione's cheek only to see her shift to the side, much to my dismay.

"Harry!" Ron greeted with a grin, sitting down across for me, Hermione close to his side. I observed how their arms gently brushed against each other as they took seat across from me. I glanced into Hermione's eyes assuming to see the joyful spark found so abundantly in Ron's, only to see a rather murky sea of brown. Perhaps not everything was quite as they were perceived to be.

Hermione picked through the menu coolly, not even hinting at any sort of personal exchange with me. I frowned as she so obviously marked her boundaries. I knew it was wrong for me to hope otherwise, but I could not simply stop my heart's desires.

"Still can't believe it's been a month since the kids left!" Ron exclaimed, taking a rather large bite from a complementary roll. I nodded, accordingly smoothing out a dog-eared corner of the menu.

"Time really does fly," I mumbled back half-heartedly.

Ron quirked an eyebrow at me over his menu, taking notice of my wary tone, but with a blink of an eye his decision had settled not to pry.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Hermione bring out her wand and gently tap the menu. Ron mimicked her action only moments later. And I too absently picked an entrée, forgetting in only seconds what exactly I had ordered.

"Oh, shoot. I got to use the loo," Ron voiced seconds later, taking stand from the table.

"Too much coffee this morning, Ron?" I joked amicably, suddenly feeling jittery at the thought of his temporary absence.

The redhead let out a friendly guffaw, "Make that pumpkin juice, mate," he retorted as he began to walk away from our booth.

My attention quickly focused back on Hermione. I wasn't quite sure what to say. I felt angry at her constant dismissal of my presence yet desperate enough to do anything to gain even a smile or a glimmer or recognition from her. My head throbbed and I damned the lack of simplicity, which proved evident in every situation, which forced itself into my life.

"Hermione…" I began, rather lamely. She looked up at me, her brown eyes boring through my mind. I couldn't help but feel like I was in some sort of staring contest with Lord Voldemort himself. I blinked rapidly and cleared my throat in vain.

"You don't seem yourself these days…" I pried, knowing well that I had picked a rather awkward topic to begin our conversation with.

"It's really nothing, Harry," she responded, not quite meeting my gaze.

"You're my best friend, I can tell if something is wrong," I prodded. "I could tell even at 9 and ¾ that something was just not right,"

Hermione let out an odd noise at my remark, a mix between a huff and a deep-throated gurgle of some sort. "If I recall correctly, neither did you,"

It was my turn to raise an eyebrow "Paying close attention to my expressions, eh?" I tested, trying to hide my surprise at her observation.

"So you deem it true then?" she countered.

I sighed. I should have known my glee would be short-lived.

Hermione leaned back, resting her head against the cushioning of the booth. I fiddled with my straw as I took a sip of my drink.

"It would have been Emily's first year at Hogwarts this year," she said softly.

I nearly choked on my drink, hastily setting it back down and pushing it away from me. I glanced back at Hermione only to see her eyes glazed over and bottom lip trembling.

"Oh Hermione…" I whispered, moving to her side of the booth as my mind screamed at me not too. I pulled her into a warm embrace and sat surprised that she didn't make an effort to pull away. I felt myself bury my nose into her curly hair and take in its lovely scent of vanilla and fresh parchment. I sighed allowing her to sob into my shirt, resting my chin on her head as I wondered where Ron had gone off to. It had been at least five minutes by now.

I gazed beyond her bushy hair to see Ron in the distance, frozen in mid-stride as he watched us. His face was blank, but somewhere deep down; I could see a shadow of longing within his blue eyes. As our eyes met, he sent me a small nod of agreement, our signature form of communication these days. He turned to go find to our waiter; and I assumed he was requesting for our orders to be to-go.

Hermione slowly pulled away from me, her eyes now thoroughly bloodshot and her cheeks tearstained. She stared sadly at me and I could not help but stare back into those honey-toned eyes of hers. In my arms and so raw with emotion, she had never looked so beautiful.

I watched as she continued to stare at me through lidded eyes, which had now darkened considerably to a stunning shade of velvety brown. She bit her lower lip ever so slightly and my mind reeled in exhilaration. I could feel her lean in as the tension mounted. Her soft lips so close to mine. Her warm breath hot on my own.

But this time, it was my turn to pull away.

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**TBC…**

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**AN**: So, what did you think? Please Review!


	6. Chapter VI: Step Behind Me Satan

**AN: **Thanks for the great reviews! A few have you been asking if Hermione will find out about Lily's true parenting. The answer to that is yes, BUT I have not decided when or how that will happen. So its occurrence will be a surprise to us all, myself included.

**Disclaimer**: JKR owns.

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**Chapter 6: Step Behind Me Satan**

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I tried to control my rather ragged breathing as I abruptly pulled away from Hermione. Glancing to my side, she sat staring vacantly away from me, looking both frazzled and disorientated from what had almost occurred. Her eyes had widened in horror and I watched as her face took on a haze of emotions. I couldn't quite decide if she was about to consume herself in tears once again, or berate herself over her own chanced recklessness.

The booth soon faded from sight as I felt myself take leave from my seat. A nervous hand running through my unruly locks as I pushed away from the current situation and darted towards the men's room. Clutching the sides of the marble sink inside, I absently stared at my own reflection. My eyes peering back at me, exploding with a diminishing emotion of some sort as my cheeks glowed fiercely in self-construed agitation. As the minutes passed, I slowly felt my breathing even out and my heart gradually cease to race. But my cool green eyes stared back at me with an entirely different story to tell.

From my right, the door opened once again, and an elderly wizard walked in gazing at me curiously. I hurriedly dried my face and bolted out the door in a haste to only take notice of the scene in front of me with wary dismay. Ron was now at Hermione's side as she continued to cry inconsolably into his shirt. Poor Ron, I wondered. His sentiments would not have been so considerate and touching had he known the actuality behind those devastated tears, which now lay dried against Hermione's pale face.

I walked slowly towards the couple, unknowing as to my next course of action. I couldn't help but gloat over the fact that I knew now for sure that Hermione's feelings for me still raged deep within her. There was clearly more to those absent-minded nods and indifferent acknowledgements than what had met the eye. She had so deviously attempted to fool me, but once again had failed to succeed. I was her best friend, her true love. And she was undoubtedly mine.

The back of Ron's head was to me, and Hermione's now rested silently in the crook of his neck. I watched as he leaned in to kiss her softly and I suddenly felt an invisible boulder slam into my gut with notable force. My mind insisted that Hermione was not responding to his premonitions, but my eyes saw otherwise as she eagerly leaned in to kiss him back.

My heart sunk. I could not stand to watch this any more. It was no longer my situation to handle; and with that I apparated out of sight, for all to see. Yet no one had taken notice to watch.

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After grabbing a stack of files from my ministry desk I disapparated back into the Potter house, an even duller environment than the last. I refused to let myself think back on what had happened at the restaurant today. I could not believe I had almost, in full awareness, kissed Hermione Granger. This time I did not even have an alibi towards infidelity. This time it would have been a legit mistake. The thuds of my heart lightened at the idea of resisting temptation. Yet my mind still reeled at the very thought. The thought of Hermione's lips on my very own. I could just feel it.

I snapped out of my own sober delirium as an owl tapped impatiently on the glass window of my office. Opening the window, the tawny brown creature jumped inside, and stared at me impatiently a letter clamped tightly within its beak. Throwing it an owl treat, I took the message, tearing open the seal to only see James' all familiar handwriting.

_Dear Mum and Dad,_

_I cannot believe it has almost been a month since school has begun. I'm sorry for not writing to you sooner. I've reminded Lily and Albus to get in touch with you two as well, so the two of you won't worry. _

_Albus and I have both been chosen to be part of the Gryffindor Quidditch team this year! Albus as seeker, and I a chaser. Practice and studies have been keeping us very busy these days, but we still manage to have time for fun and friends especially with a Hogsmeade weekend coming up very soon._

_Lily has been doing well in Gryffindor; she has become even better friends with Hugo lately too. Sometimes I think she is even closer to him than she is with us. Maybe it is because they study together and are both first years. Yesterday I saw her reading an Advanced Potions book in the common room; I don't even qualify for that class yet!_

_Anyways, it's time for dinner. I promise to write again soon._

_Love, _

_James_

I smiled down at the letter, rereading it a few more times. I was glad Lily was fitting in well and not at all surprised that she was finding more comfort in Hugo than she was with Albus and James. But the studying, I couldn't even imagine anything more Hermione-like than reading ahead by several years' worth in course work. Neither Ginny nor I had been avid studiers. We were concerned with our grades, but not enough to devote ourselves to a variety of methods in anti-procrastination especially in a course such as Potions. It was only too evident that Lily was taking more and more after Hermione as the years passed by, but thankfully no one was any the wiser.

I glanced at the picture frame on my desk. I missed the three of them so much. Their presence eased my days and quickened my step but their absence only served to dull my mood. I scribbled back a reply to James and watched as the Hogwarts owl flew away into the distance.

I absently went down the stairs, reading James letter yet again before I left it on Ginny's office table downstairs. I glanced up surprised as I heard some rustling nearby; I hadn't even realized she had been home all along.

"Hey you," she greeted as she peered at me from above her reading glasses. I sent her a half smile as I sat down and handed her James letter.

She grinned as she read it and I watched as her features warmed as she read every word of his harried message. I looked away from her and out the window as she finished reading the letter and set it down along with her reading glasses. I could hear her shift away from her seat as she gently sat down on my lap and kissed my forehead.

"Do you have the afternoon off?" she asked softly, brushing away the fringe from my eyes

I nodded as she leaned in and held me close to her thin frame. I wrapped my arms around her waist and placed my head against her shoulder.

She gently pulled away and ran her thumb gently over my bottom lip. I stared into her eyes, almost nervously. As much as I loved Ginny, I did not have much of a romantic appetite at the moment. My mind was too strained and my heart too heavy. Yet despite my mind's insists, she brought me in for a long hard kiss. I could feel her lips press almost bruisingly against mine as her hand small hands ran down my chest. I sat immobilized still clutching her to me as she nuzzled my neck and sought my lips out once again.

"Ginny…I…" I muttered only to be silenced by yet another one of her eager kisses.

"Ginny…" I repeated a little more firmly, pushing her away. "I'm really…really not in the mood," I finished rather lamely with an audible gulp.

Ginny stared at me blankly, her eyebrows suddenly creasing as she stood up and straightened her fitted long-sleeve shirt. I watched as she turned away from me and stood by the bay windows of her office, hugging her arms to herself sadly.

I stared at her guiltily. I knew she was angry. She probably was fretting over the idea of us growing apart yet again. What she didn't know was that we had already reached that level, several years ago. 11 to be exact.

The muggy London sunlight shone over her face. And I watched as tears began streaming down her delicate features. She ran a hand carelessly through her red hair and squeezed her eyes shut as she pressed her smooth forehead against the cool windowpane in front of her.

I stood up. Somehow I had managed to bring two women to tears within a span of only hours. I could no longer stand this. Hermione was driving me crazy with her indecisive nature. And here I was ruining my relationship over someone who chose to devote her life to my best friend rather than myself. True, it may partially have been my fault. But Ginny was still the mother of my children and my very own wife. She may not have been Lily's biological mother but she had raised her as her very own. I felt like a coward and a traitor for letting her down on more than one occasion. I glanced up watching as Ginny still stood staring out the window, crying quietly to herself as I stood within tangible distance from her.

I could smell the scent of warm cinnamon and fresh bread emanate from her being. Her beautiful red hair fell over her shoulders in soft cascades. Ginny was the image of elegance from all angles and she was the first woman I had ever truly loved. She was the same woman I had chosen to marry and spend the rest of my life with and I had yet to show her how much I truly cared for her.

I took her hand suddenly, wheeling her around to face me. She stared at me, surprised by my action as I moved forward and pushed her against the window kissing her with all the passion I had within me. My hands fiddling with the edge of her shirt as she deepened the kiss and pulled my jumper over my head.

I ran my hands through her silky hair bringing her down onto the plush rug, which lay beside the burning fireplace in her office. I felt my heartbeats race as I continued to kiss her. I couldn't quite identify this feeling, which now burned within me like a raging fire. Could it be? That I was in fact falling for Ginny all over again?

.

It was then that I heard a tapping from the window.

.

It was Hermione's owl.

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**TBC…**

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**AN**: Please Review!


	7. Chapter VII: Love, Lies and Unmade Ties

**AN: **I'm so sorry that I have not updated in such a long time! A special thanks to all of those who take the time to review, it's so great to see your comments and constructive criticism. I think I'm going to try and make an official update day for myself. Perhaps every other Saturday night, so I don't fall behind in writing. It's always good to make time for fun after all (even though school seems to be consuming my life). Anyways, on with the story! I hope you all enjoy! And an early Happy Halloween to everyone 

**Disclaimer**: JKR owns.

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**Chapter 7: Love, Lies and Unmade Ties**

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I felt my eyes clench shut in dread as the insistent tapping of Hermione's owl continued. Ginny pulled away from me reluctantly swearing under her breath as I haphazardly pulled my clothes back on and headed towards the window. Brusquely pushing the sheer curtains aside, I opened the window letting the annoying creature in. It hooted at me obviously peeved by the wait and I glared similarly back at it, glancing wearily at the letter clasped within its beak. Snatching the missive away I tore it open in haste, impatient to see what Hermione had to say.

_Harry,_

_It is imperative that we talk. I hope the Leaky Cauldron; tomorrow, half past noon will be an alright meeting place for us both._

_Please let me know,_

_Hermione_

I sighed, my eyes once again skimming over her cramped scrawl. Ginny walked towards me, leaning her head against my shoulder as she glanced at the letter clutched in my hands.

"Is everything ok?" she asked softly. I damned her ability to read so quickly.

I nodded, folding the letter and tucking it securely into my pocket. Pressing my lips against the top of Ginny's head, I held her close, wondering what on earth it was, that Hermione wanted.

I felt as if I were in some sort of twisted game of tug-o-war. The minute my heart decided to mend its ways with Ginny, Hermione just had to reach in and claim its attention back once again.

I sighed pulling away from the pretty redhead before me, though it had been years, she was still as beautiful and compassionate as she was during Hogwarts.

I wondered when it was that all these secrets pent up within me would let lose. They groveled silently in the pits of my soul seeking escape, and one day I knew they would swarm out engulfing all those in their path. Namely Ginny and Ron, but most easily, Hermione. I felt my gut sink at the very thought. Would they all hate me? And what of the children, who were so naively born to such unfaithful parents, what would they think of their picture perfect families then?

I watched as Ginny smiled at me fleetingly, making her way into the living room down the hall. I changed my course, trudging up the spiraling staircase and into my study above. I felt the sense of inevitable doom settle back upon me as my mind filled with a spiral of self-accusations. Who had I become?

I felt as something heavy in the form of a tear press heavily against my eyelids. I thought of Lily and her unavoidable fate. Suddenly she would become the rift between us, the unseen link between our two families; the very proof of my deception, of my most unfaithful loyalties. Oh, how my mistakes continued to spite me.

I was quickly torn away from my thoughts as the office fireplace roared to life. I stared confused at the flames wondering who it was at such a late hour.

I watched as the current headmistress, Minerva McGonagall rushed towards me, her dark green robes billowing behind her as she approached.

"Harry!" she called out, her voice a sharp whisper. "Something has come up at Hogwarts; you must come with me, immediately."

Though I continued to stare at her as if in a stupor, I could feel my Auror instincts quickly kick in, my mind reeling as the sparse words McGonagall had supplied me were rapidly broken down and thoroughly analyzed.

"Ginny!" I shouted, hoping that somehow she heard through the walls, a full floor away.

"No, Harry," McGonagall warned me, stepping closer. "This is for you to know and you alone, for the time being at least. Please, just come with me."

I grabbed my cloak in a daze, scribbling a note on my desk for Ginny to find. I hoped to God she would not worry.

I rushed towards the fireplace, throwing a handful of floo powder in as both McGonagall and I stepped in, disappearing into a sudden flurry of green flames.

I felt an abrupt rush of déjà vu as the sight of the Headmistress' office dawned upon me. The familiar tinkering trivialities of Dumbledore's office had been replaced with the practical and quaint of McGonagall's.

"This way," McGonagall urged from behind me, quickly leading us past her ornate desk and into the area adjoining the infamous staircase which lead up to the headmistress' abode.

I found myself stop short as I saw none other than my own, Lily Potter, stare back at me from beside a lonesome shelf in the room. I rushed towards her, bringing her into a full embrace. My mind trying to process what in fact was happening.

I felt her arms limply hug me back back and I pulled away from her in earnest, searching her eyes in confusion.

"What's wrong sweetie?" I asked gazing into her youthful face.

"Harry, please," McGonagall urged only a few steps behind me. "Let's have a seat now, shall we?" I heard her say, as if she were already consoling me for some unknown reasons.

I nodded wearily pulling away from my daughter as I sunk down into the velvety cushioning of my proffered chair. Lily sat down in the seat beside me refusing to look me in the eye.

I stared back at McGonagall, confusion about to erupt from within me.

"Harry," the headmistress began, effortlessly clearing her throat as she spoke. "It seems that Lily is a little more advanced at her age than any of us expected,"

I eyed McGonagall wearily, wondering what exactly she meant.

"To be specific, Lily seems to have somehow mastered the powerful skill of wandless magic."

I felt myself swivel around to stare at Lily, as if seeing her for the first time. It couldn't be. It had to be impossible. Wandless magic was such a powerful and rare talent. There were few who held such a power, namely Dumbledore, myself, and…..Hermione.

I could feel my insides turn.

"And by wandless magic, I mean the controlled use of it, not what is seen sporadically amongst children in the wizarding world."

I involuntarily nodded, my mind already having processed that.

I didn't know what quite to say, my problems quickly seemed to have multiplied. What would Ginny think if she knew of such a power in Lily? Would it be deemed a coincidence that her supposedly "adopted daughter" and husband uncannily shared such a rare talent?

And what of Lily? The youngest of three, who grew up thinking that she was in fact biologically and in every sense the daughter of both Ginny and I.

The silence ensued as McGonagall allowed me to process what was in fact happening. I wondered what had made her insist that Ginny not come along with me. She after all had no knowledge that Lily was not in reality a Potter-Weasley child in truth.

I had thought too soon.

"Lily also keyed me in, on a more pressing matter…you could say," the headmistress continued. I sensed that she was somehow indirectly accusing me of something.

I glanced over at Lily who I now saw was crying.

I reached out to hold her hand, only to see her quickly pull away.

"Lily…" I whispered, wondering what on earth was happening.

"This past summer…" she began, her face set now in sorrowful determination "...when I was trying to find a place to hide James' broom from him I wound up in Mum's old study on the third floor,"

I felt my heartbeats grow louder, wondering what Lily could possibly have unearthed from there.

"I found old papers in the second to last drawer of Mum's desk…they were legal documents," Lily whispered, tears were now flowing freely down her face.

"They were informal documents drawn by Mum from Aunt Luna… the night I was born. They were cosigned by Aunt Luna and her then-fiancé Rolf Scamander stating that my guardianship was being hereby…unofficially transferred."

I could feel my breaths become gasps for air as I struggled to find reason.

I brought myself to look back at Lily who now almost looked angry as she stared ahead of her, sobs breaking through her small frame.

"How could you?" she asked, her hazel eyes full of accusation.

"How could you take me away from my real parents? And where are they now?"

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**AN**: Uh oh, looks like Lily has made a breakthrough, yet in entirely the wrong direction. How will Harry clarify to both Ginny and his daughter, two entirely different problems? Please Review!


	8. Chapter VIII: The Troubling Truth

**AN: **I feel like I am constantly letting down readers with lagging updates. I am SO very sorry! Now that it is winter break, hopefully I can get this story up and running again. I'd also like to let you all know that I have started writing a few other fics, and have recently posted them on profile. So please feel free to take a look at them. I'm trying to branch out with my writing style, so we'll see where those go. :) I'd like to thank everyone for all the support. You guys are the best. Every time I add a chapter I'm shocked by the number of favorites/alerts I get. (But remember, reviews are much appreciated too :D ) Anyways, on with the story! Please R&R!

**Disclaimer**: JKR owns.

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**Chapter 8: The Troubling Truth**

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"Lily…sweetheart…it's not what it seems…" I began, trying to come to terms with the dilemma suddenly in before me.

Lily shot a disbelieving glance in my direction, sharply looking away as her shoulders quivered with her every trembling breath.

I could understand her pain. The feeling of betrayal, the idea of your entire world crumbling into pieces. But what wrong had I done? I was indeed her father, a man who raised her with all the love in the world. But with every wizard, comes his mistakes, and under the oath of morality, loving Hermione had been the biggest one of all.

I reached out towards her, and was pleasantly surprised to see that she did not bolt in the other direction. I could feel her shaking against my chest as I murmured soothing words into her vibrant hair. It was just like it had been when she was younger, all those years ago.

"Lil, your mother and I truly are your paren…" I was cut off as Lily pushed away from me yet again.

"How can you continue to lie to me like this?" she questioned, her voice a voice rising with every word. I couldn't bear to look her in the eye. The fiery anger in her gaze brought out the uncanny resemblance between her and Hermione even more. It was almost unnerving.

I gulped, shifting awkwardly in my seat. I noticed McGonagall looked a bit unsettled and confused by the recent string of events. I didn't blame her. I felt like I had been suddenly swamped into a muggle soap episode myself.

Lily stood up; staring down at me, her anger crumbled. I could see the sadness that swamped her hazel eyes; even she didn't want to be in this predicament anymore than I did.

"Dad, I love you…I could never bear to hate you," she whispered. I nodded, tears clouding my sight. "But you have to tell me the truth, it's only fair," she continued, I could almost sense a feeling of foreboding in her voice, an unspoken warning of some sort.

I nodded half-heartedly, looking away. Lily, so like Hermione, always the voice of reason, even in the heat of an argument.

"Dad?" she prodded, her small hand on my shoulder. I gazed back into her eyes, I just couldn't do it. How could I tell Lily before Hermione, or even Ginny? I felt as Lily's hand slipped away in defeat, her face was now clouded with an expression I couldn't quite read.

"It's no use is it?" she asked, "you'll never tell." And without another word, Lily took her final leave, wandlessly placing her belongings back into her day bag and retreating from sight. I watched her disappear into the spiral staircase adjoining the headmistress' office. So many times before, had I used it, with questions of my own. I couldn't bear to recognize the irony of the situation. Year after year, I had yearned to learn more about my parentage, and now when my very own daughter asked me the same question, begging for the truth, I had denied her that exact right.

"Harry…" McGonagall called from across the ornate desk. "I'm not entirely sure what it is that Lily is implying, but whatever it may be, she deserves to know."

I nodded, clasping my hands in anxiety.

"It is always better that the ones you care about the most hear the truth from you before they learn of it from another source. You will only inflict more pain on them, by withholding what is rightfully theirs."

McGonagall was now at my side, a comforting hand placed on my shoulder. I watched as she poured me a steaming cup of tea, placing it before me with a knowing gaze

"It will help soothe your nerves, Harry." I nodded, thanking her as I took a sip. I had to go home and talk to Ginny, she was my wife and I had played her for a fool for far too long. Hermione would be next; it had been 12 years, 12 years that I had taken away from her knowing Lily as a daughter. My heart thudded heavily. I could feel the guilt settling in all over again, it was far too overbearing.

McGonagall watched me with a wary eye, a pained expression marring her wise features. I couldn't thank the woman enough, she had always played a matronly role in my life, providing me with words of wisdom throughout my childhood and even to this day.

"I should go," I said, standing up from my seat. McGonagall nodded, clearing away the tea with a flick of her wand. I noticed she did not pry. Anyone else would have been curious as to the meaning behind Lily's words, but I sensed the aging professor knew that one day the time for her to know would come, and until then she would wait.

I glanced up at the portrait of Dumbledore in the headmistress' office, he winked at me cheerily, and I could help but send a small smile back. I had to man up and do the right thing. I had been hurting those around me for so many years now. Ginny had to know, Hermione had to know, and Ron; Ron would despise me with all the hatred in the world. He would never forgive me, for what I had done to Ginny, to his family, to his wife. I could only hope that he would not hold anything against Hermione, none of this had ever been her fault. It was always mine.

I stepped onto the staircase, gazing up as I spiraled down. I needed a good walk to clear my mind before arriving back home. I needed to figure out how exactly I would tell Ginny about my horrible feat, my miserable lie, my crushing defeat.

Walking off the stairwell, I hastily rushed into a professor who was heading towards the headmistress' office.

Odd, a professor who smelled uncannily of vanilla and parchment.

"Hermione?" I almost yelled as the person in question pulled away from me in the dim light.

I could feel my heart beat uncontrollably. What had she been doing here? Had she seen Lily on her way in?

"Harry, I came to your house in search for you…Ginny redirected me to Hogwarts and I arrived just in time to hear you talking to Lily." I could feel my stomach plummet as she spoke, this couldn't be happening.

"I couldn't help but listen, Harry…," she continued. I clenched my eyes shut. This couldn't be happening; my worst nightmare had suddenly become a reality.

"I don't understand...Is this why Lily's arrival came as such a surprise to us all those years ago? Because Ginny had never been pregnant with her to being with?

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**AN**: Dun dun dun…and the story continues! :) Please Review!


	9. Chapter IX: Martyred Sorrow

**AN: **Hello all. Sorry for the horrible cliffhanger from the last chapter. I know you all must hate me for it. :) Anyhow, here is the next installment of _Breaking Reality_. I hope you all enjoy!

**Disclaimer**: JKR owns.

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**Chapter 9: Sorrow's Martyr**

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"Hermione, please," I urged, grabbing hold of her shoulders. "I have no time to talk. I have to get back home, to Ginny. NOW," I insisted.

The brunette only chose to glare at me instead. Pulling out of my restraining hold on her "No, Harry," she demanded, cornering me against the wall. "You must explain, what is it that you can't even tell me about?" she pried, her gaze searching mine.

I eyed her steadily, wondering how to rid myself of this predicament. Lily and Hermione would remain in the dark until Ginny learned the truth. She was my wife. She deserved to know first.

Fingering my wand, I sighed. Choosing to ignore her, I began walking, picking up the pace as I did so.

"Harry!" she shrieked after me, enraged. "How dare you ignore me!"

I began running, turning the corner and murmuring a disillusionment charm as I went. Never in my life did I imagine running away from my very own best friend like this. I was a mess, a bloody coward.

Exiting through the East wing, I passed through the Quidditch locker rooms. An idea struck me as I ran into the Gryffindor one, grabbing hold of an abandoned broomstick. Kicking off from the ground, I flew a reasonable distance, touching down at an apparition spot and then just as quickly, disappearing from sight.

I sighed stepping out of my study; I couldn't believe how childishly I had acted. Running away from my guilt, I had tried in vain to avoid the looming situation before me. With a casual wave of my wand I set up a variety of wards, temporarily blocking out all visitors. McGonagall, Ron and Hermione included. I had to speak to Ginny, and with no distractions, before anyone else got to her first.

Trying to steady my breathing, I went down the stairs in search of my adoring wife. As predicted, she sat at the breakfast table, reading glasses perched on her freckled nose as she read the latest issue of the _Daily Prophet._

"Ginny," I called out softly.

She looked up, standing quickly and running towards me.

I embraced her gently, pulling back to look at her, "Have a seat; there's something I need to tell you," I said quietly, leading her to the sitting area.

She nodded, setting down her glasses and taking hold of my hand.

I smiled sadly at her.

I could see the concern in her eyes, "What is it Harry?" she asked. "One minute you're gone and the next Hermione comes hurtling in demanding to know where you are."

I nodded, rubbing my thumb over her knuckles. I was at a loss for words. I didn't even know where to start.

"McGonagall called me in today, to talk to me about Lily," I began, gazing steadily at Ginny.

Her forehead crinkled in confusion, yet she remained silent.

"Lily, as we know, is a very talented witch, exceptionally bright and a fast learner," I continued.

Ginny nodded, already aware of these facts yet unsure where I was going with this.

"Recent events have highlighted such characteristics in her, yet one above all others. A talent rarely found even among the most advanced of witches and wizards," I explained, feeling Ginny's grip on my hand tighten.

"Lily has proven to be fully capable of controlled wandless magic," I stated, looking down.

Ginny's sharp intake of breath said it all. I glanced back up at her, my expression wary.

Her eyes were clouded with an emotion, yet one I could not quite recognize.

"Is there more?" she questioned, trying in vain to keep her voice steady.

I nodded, dejectedly, "Ginny, when I tell you this, you must promise to hear me out, before you say anything…anything at all. Please, promise me this," I pleaded, clasping her small hand in both of mine.

She nodded; though I sensed an overbearing feeling of trepidation in her glance.

"I promise," she whispered, taking her free hand to brush away a few strands of loose hair.

I resumed my explanation, taking a deep breath.

"Last summer, Lily was upstairs in your old study," I began again. "While up there she caught sight of something- something I didn't even know existed to begin with," I said softly, catching Ginny's eye.

"She had found the unofficial documents Luna and you had drawn the night she was born," I stated quietly. Ginny pulled away, covering her face as she stifled a sob.

I brought my arms around her, rubbing her back as I felt hot tears run down the front of my shirt.

"Shhh, Gin. Don't cry," I soothed dejectedly. It must have been the guilt that caused her to cry. For all these years we had kept Lily's adoption a well-hidden secret. Now that the cat was out of the bag, there was nothing left for us to do, except to confess, to stand in front of our children as liars.

"She never t-told us," Ginny wailed into my chest. I nodded sullenly. I could only imagine the shock Lily had felt, learning of her adoption. She was only twelve…only a child.

Slowly, the redhead reluctantly pulled away from me, "Go on, what else did she say?"

"Well, you can only begin to guess her confusion when months later, she found herself capable of wandless magic, a highly genetic trait, especially for one so young. The very reason as to why so many educated witches and wizards find themselves incapable of fully mastering it even at the height of their adulthood. It is something one is born with, not something to be acquired," I explained, as Ginny leaned into me again, pressing her cheek against my chest.

"Gin," I murmured, pulling away from her gently. "There's something else I've kept from you," I continued, my throat running dry.

Ginny glanced up at me solemnly. I wasn't sure how much more of this she could take. Already, she looked devastated, staring up at me with blood-shot eyes, dried tears staining her smooth cheeks. After this moment she would hate me forever. Curse my very existence. Leave me to rot in my self-made misery.

"Ginny," I said, my voice cracking. "The child Hermione gave birth to all those years ago…was no stillborn…she lived...," I said, my eyes were burning. "She's our Lily, Gin…our very own Lil," I told her, tears were now streaming down my eyes.

Ginny sobbed louder at this, turning away from me. "I'm sorry Gin, but I had every right to take her away. Lily had never been Ron's daughter…She was my mine! My daughter with H-Hermione," I whispered, running a furious hand through my hair.

I glanced back at Ginny who was shaking in her tears, "Say something," I pleaded, "anything," I begged as tears continued to cloud my vision.

She finally turned to face me, gently cupping my wet cheek with her hand. "I know Harry," she murmured softly, "I was with her the night Lily was born."

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**AN: Please Review!**


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